Take your clothes off and say “I do”

So how would you feel about being naked on TV?  Hedonism Resorts are looking for couples who would like the tie the knot in the nude in front of a few hundred thousand of their closest cable tv friends.  http://www.hedonism.com/nudewedding/

So what do the winning couples get?   (Apart from goosebumps and maybe a sunburn where you don’t want it.)  Well they get a free wedding for one thing and 4 nights complimentary stay at the Hedonism Resort in Jamaica.  Having dealt with a number of brides and destination weddings I can see the merit in a nude wedding.  Certainly it would cut down on the cost and the time of choosing “the dress” and all the stuff that goes with the dress – special shoes, expensive undies, silk stockings.  However getting  married in the nude poses some problems too –

• what to do with the boutonniere – can’t really pin it on.  Could we hang it on something ?…….
• something old….. mmm … that depends on your age
• something new ….  hey you could get new boobs
• something borrowed …. maybe earrings
• something blue ….. eyeshadow
• careful with that bouquet …. and no darling you can’t use it to hide behind – this is supposed to be a nude wedding – that’s why you are getting it free.

What about the bridesmaids – do they have to be nude too?  Well  now that’s just not fair.  Everyone knows that the bride always chooses one or two best friends who are – well – chubby.  No fair to ask them to forgo their Spanks and strut their stuff down the aisle.  Perhaps everyone has to be in the nude including his family, her family, the justice of the piece (sorry I mean peace – that was a Freudian slip).

I can’t see it myself – in fact that’s the whole problem – I can see it all too clearly in my mind and it’s not pretty!