Snakes on planes – monkeys in pants

Yes they made a movie about this – pretty bad one actually – but fantasy becomes reality on an Egypt Air flight recently.  http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2012/12/04/egyptair-snake-on-plane-emergency-landing-passenger-bitten_n_2238602.html

So you can imagine the reaction when there really is a snake on a flight.  Images abound when you google “snakes on a plane” – some of them from the film and others not so much.  snakes 1It seems pretty ridiculous that someone can sneak on a snake.  The security I went through on my recent travels (on Egypt Air no less) was quite stringent.  But I guess snakes don’t have belt buckles or cell phones that could trigger security alarms and I wonder what a snake in a bag looks like on the x-ray?  Did you wonder too?  Then wonder no more…. here is the real thing.
xray_of_seizure Seen by security officials in Australia. … It really could only be snakes, unless someone was trying to smuggle in sausages.  Makes you wonder what other weird things people try to smuggle onto flights.  I was told last week by someone who shall remain nameless, that she smuggled pork chops into Dubai when her son was working there because, for obvious reasons, you just can’t get pork chops there.  Problem was, her flight was delayed and therefore so was her luggage.  Happy ending – the pork chops arrived frozen solid.  Just as well she had it in her checked baggage and not carry on!

How would you feel sitting next to a man with monkeys in his pants?  Seriously.  “In 2002, when customs workers opened a man’s bag in Los Angeles after he returned from Thailand, a bird of paradise flew out. They ended up finding three more birds and 50 rare orchids in his suitcase. When officials asked him whether he had anything else illegal he was bringing into the country, the man said, “Yes, I’ve got monkeys in my pants.” He turned over the pair of young pygmy monkeys, which are an endangered species in the U.S., that he had been carrying inside his underwear, and they were taken to the Los Angeles Zoo. The man received a 57-day jail sentence.”

And finally – back to the snakes.   A woman from Sweden was caught with 75 snakes in her bra on a flight.  I am not kidding – 75 snakes.  Where the heck do you put 75 snakes in anybody’s bra?  Customs officers became suspicious when she kept scratching herself.  I am surprised the man with monkeys in his pants wasn’t scratching himself too.

So next time you get on a flight take a hard look at the person sitting next to you.  You never really do know…..

snakes 2

By Lesley Keyter

Lesley Keyter is the face of travel in the fast growing city of Calgary. Every week since 1997 she has has featured live on the Morning News Global TV.

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