Gosh, I must have dozed off

Hey, my name is Wally and a funny thing happened to me on the way to the feeding grounds. I guess I was just being lazy by wanting to hitch a ride on that little iceberg but it seemed like a good idea at the time. To be honest I was getting sick and tired of Mrs. W getting at me and saw this as a great way to grab five minutes of peace and quiet. Sheesh, that woman can drive a walrus round the bend. Tells me I am flabby and that she is sick to death of clams. Says I should grow a pair and bring home something decent for dinner.

Well I guess the peace and quiet really got to me. It was quiet and the sun had poked out between the clouds. The iceberg was cool but that didn’t bother me having at least 4 inches of blubber to keep me insulated (flabby indeed! the cheek of it). The waves were gently bobbing up and down and well I must confess I dozed off.

I woke up with a start … dribble down my chest and a mild headache. Where the hell was I. The iceberg had dwindled to a quarter of its size and was well on its way to sinking. I had to get off and do it quickly and make for land. But this land looked really different. Hmm, probably lost. Now that will really give the missus something to go on about. Well I better get moving.

I jumped off the slowly melting iceberg and made my way to the land. I was quite exhausted and snuggled up onto the warm rock to catch my breath.

As I was resting on the rocks I heard voices and my first thought was that they sounded different from the humans I had heard before. Usually if I pop up out of the sea next to a kayaker they get quite the fright and might yell out “Ikiunnga” which is some sort of cry for help in their language. But these humans sounded completely different. And it was sort of weird because there was a big one and a small one dressed in bright colours and jumping up and down and shouting. It was quite infectious actually so I started waving my flippers around. Quite irresistable in fact.

But now I have to think about how to get back home. I am in for a right tongue wagging from the missus but wait till I tell her about my adventures. She’s not going to believe this. But I have the proof – they even took a video. And yes I was very very embarrassed.

By Lesley Keyter

Lesley Keyter is the face of travel in the fast growing city of Calgary. Every week since 1997 she has has featured live on the Morning News Global TV.

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