Buy shares in lipstick

Well the masks are starting to come off and there will be a rush to the make up counter for lipstick which will become as valuable as toilet paper used to be. Maybe it’s a good time to buy shares in the make up industry.

We have got so used to wearing masks and, while it is a personal decision, I think I will continue to wear mine for a little while longer – especially in crowded places. I have a young grandchild who obviously is not yet vaccinated and some compromised family members so I feel that is the responsible thing to do. But it will be strange indeed. While I joke about lipstick I cannot – just cannot – leave the house without touching up my lipstick, despite the fact that it is going to get smeared all over the inside of my mask. Old habits die hard.

As adults we learn to deal with these inconveniences of life – but what about the kids? And even more what about the teachers who have to deal with the masked kids in the school room. I read some hilarious “what the teacher has to say” suggestions and having had three kids, although I have never been a teacher, it made me chuckle with its reality.

Please don’t snap Billy’s mask in his face.

Your mask is not a necklace, bracelet, or any other form of jewelry.

You should not be using your mask as a slingshot. Please put it back on your face.

Please do not chew on your mask.

Your mask should be on your face, not on the back of your head

I’m sorry your mask is wet, but that’s what happens when you lick the inside of it.

I’m sorry you sneezed. Here’s a tissue. Wipe out the snot as well as you can.

No, you may not blow your nose in your mask.

Why is your mask soaking wet? You just came back from the bathroom?

And you put it back on your face after you dropped it?

I’m sorry you broke the elastic on your mask by seeing how far the band would stretch. Now you’ll have to hold the mask on your face … or use this duct tape.

Please take the mask off your eyes and watch where you’re walking. I don’t care if you have X-ray vision.

Please take the mask off of your pencil and stop twirling it.

I know the mask fits over your pants like a knee pad, but please take it off of your leg and put it on your face.

What do you mean you tried to eat your lunch through your mask?

Please don’t share your mask or trade masks. I don’t care if you like Ingrid’s mask better than yours.

I’m sorry, but your mask is not school appropriate.

We’re not comparing our masks to other kids’ masks… everyone’s mask is unique and special.

No, you may not decorate your mask instead of doing your work. I don’t care if you have a Sharpie.

You’re not a pirate, please take your mask off your eye.

Try to get the gum off as much as you can.

Please don’t use your mask to pick your nose.

I’m sorry you tripped, but that’s what happens when you put your feet inside the elastic of your mask.

No, your mask doesn’t make it hard to get your work done.

Your Mom will need to get you a new mask since you chewed a hole in that one.

Why is there a shoe print on your mask?

No, you cannot eat the snow through your mask.

I don’t care if you were in art class and being creative; we do not decorate our masks.

We do not beam other kids in the face with balls. No, their masks don’t make it not hurt.

Please don’t plug your nose holes with your mask.

Who’s making that noise?

I’m sorry your ponytail is stuck, that’s what happens when you see how many times you can wrap it around your mask.

I’m sorry to tell you, but your child thought her mask made her a superhero. She tried to fly off the jungle gym at recess …

I’m sorry your breath stinks in your mask, maybe we should all try to brush better.

From We Are Teachers

By Lesley Keyter

Lesley Keyter is the face of travel in the fast growing city of Calgary. Every week since 1997 she has has featured live on the Morning News Global TV.

6 comments

  1. I tap will be wearing my mask for a while longer -it’s become something of a security blanket! I will share ‘what the teacher has to say” with my daughter , who teaches grade 3, and has probably said or heard most of those things! Thanks for the smile today!

    Like

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